that feeling of emptiness
living alone, many thousands of km from your family, adapting to a new geogrpahy, waking up in the middle of the night to maintain communications with the homeland, while also preparing for a normal day in the new land.
very quickly, within a week of coming back from vacation, i find myself craving for company, just someone to talk to. in fact its not even the need to talk to someone, just that comforting feeling of having people around who are there for you, who are yours.
to feel for a moment that you are not a trespasser, that you belong. then come the yellow lights, waking up in the night and spending the first quarter of the day in darkness under the yellow luminescent lights, gives no sense of joy or comfort.
strange that many days on the ships i used to sail on where such. its a feeling or a situation i think we humans are not designed to get used to. there are lands that we belong to, communities we belong to. it behoves us to continually improve those communities.
there could be coping mechanisms. one is discipline, of sleep hygiene, nutrition hygiene and exercise hygiene. but to maintain discipline, its important to have a purpose - a long term goal or objective. this comes with a vision or ambition for life. its important to identify that, and hold that as the north star and design the day's discipline around it.
else the listlessness is constant, ever-present and debilitating.